RETRO: steve nash is not the mvp

I dream of the following exchange during the playoffs:

Dirk Nowitzki: Hello, Steven, I see you are doing vell vith your new squad. (sighs) You are no longer my little liebenmunsch!

Steve Nash: Guess not, eh.

Dirk Nowitzki: (nearly in tears) Ummm.... errrr... NOW IS THE TIME ON SPROCKETS WHEN WE DANCE!!?

Speaking of Steve Nash and all things basketball, I am firmly in the he doesn't deserve MVP camp. Here's why:

1. Doesn't play defense. MVPs cannot work half time.

2. Offensively, he's not the guy I worry about most in the league, either. Probably not even on his own team. I don't knock him for having a lower scoring average than usual... but he's not the guy to watch.

3. Yes, Phoenix won like twice the games they did last year, but that's misleading. Last year Stoudemire missed a lot of the season with injury. After he went down, they started losing, then traded Marbury away for nothing. So of course they look better this year... for much of last year, they didn't have their top threat and ANY real point! The year before, they were in the playoffs, and were seen as a hot young team on the rise. Before last season, they were expected to do well. SO they should be reaching their peak... which they are. Last year was more of an anamoly.

4. Continuing with this, you can argue that Stoudemire was more helpful after coming back this season more improved. Joe Johnson also stepped it up. And Quentin Richardson was a good addition. It wasn't just him. And of course, credit goes to the coaching staff and the front office for being innovative and running with a small lineup.

5. You can think of other guys, who, after trading places with him, would do just as well, if not better. Kidd, Bibby, Andre Miller, Parker, even Tinsley.... although this list brings me to the next one...

6. There aren't a lot of great, true, pass-first points playing right now. In the East especially, you have AI and Wade and Arenas and Francis and Marbury and Billups being more scorers, even though they are all-star level guards. Nash looks better because he's part of a dying breed.

7. The Mavs didn't fall apart without him. That's generally not a good sign if you wanna show that a guy is the most irreplaceable player in the league.

8. Jason Kidd did more with less and never got an MVP. With the Nets, or even with Phoenix. He took a Suns team that didn't have nearly the talent Nash has around himself now to 56 wins a couple years ago. Didn't get him anything. Even more appaling, John Stockton never got an MVP, and he's way ahead of Nash. So why do we annoint Nash over Stoudemire or anyone else when we NEVER gave anything to Stockton over Karl Malone?

9. They are NOT winning the title. If so, I will take everything back that I said. But I won't have to. They may not even win this series.

10. Yup. Just lost a game at home. Never a good way to establish dominance.

So who do I like? Everyone else seems to be going for Shaq, which is tempting. Look at the Lakers (on that note, hhaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhaa laughing deliriously hhaaha ahahahaahha haaaaahaaaaaahaaahhahhhhhhhhaaa sorrry) and how they've fallen this year. But Wade is much better than I thought, and it's not just because Shaq opens things up for him. He carries that team at times.No, my MVP is a lame but safe pick, Tim Duncan. I hate voting for him every year, and I have a feeling the press did too, and wanted to award a scrappy white guy who runs everywhere. It's fun to vote for Nash, but it's wrong. Everything revolves around Duncan, and he plays great D. They fell on their faces when he was injured, and that's what kept them from having the best record. At the break, they were ahead, and they always play much better in the second half. Honestly, if Duncan didn't get hurt, Phoenix would not have the best record. The Spurs could have gotten to 65 or more wins. Really. I don't think they're going to lose from now on, unless they have more injury problems. And that's all I have to say about that.